By Josh Eiserike

Published: May 10, 2008

Carolyn Thomas was shot in the face and lived to tell the story. "I was shot at point-blank range by my abusive boyfriend," Thomas, 37, a motivational speaker living in Waco, Texas, said. "He also shot and killed my mother."

She's had a long struggle through reconstructive surgeries and rehabilitation, but these days, Thomas hopes her story inspires others and raises awareness for domestic violence issues.

She will be sharing her story as part of "Women Meeting Challenges-Making Change," a conference sponsored by Action in the Community Through Service/Turning Points, a non-profit organization in Prince William County dedicated to alleviating domestic violence, homelessness and hunger. The May 17 conference features motivational speakers, vendors and entertainment. It is also open to men, as some of the programming is geared specifically toward them. The conference, as featured speaker Lexy Dove put it, is open to "anyone in the world who has problems."

***

Carolyn Thomas was with her boyfriend, Terrence, for eight years. When they met, he told her he was a mechanic, but in reality, he sold drugs out of a body shop. When he was sent to jail on drug charges around 2000, Thomas knew she had to get away, but she didn't have a plan. Terrence wrote her from prison, telling her "'til death do us part" and he'd kill her if she broke up with him.

"When he was released in October 2003 I was trying to be his friend, trying to be cordial," Thomas said.

Then, on Dec. 5, 2003, Terrence grew irate because he believed someone was in the apartment with Thomas. He screamed and came in with a .44 magnum, shooting at the ceiling and floor.

"I immediately went to praying," Thomas said. "He shot my mother (Janice Reeves) in the stomach right in front of me."

Then, Terrence shot her at point-blank in the face, right at the temple. She said she didn't feel any pain; just felt that her face was like a sponge. She said the sensation was an "out of body experience," falling down a tunnel into black.  Thomas wasn't sure how long she was out, but woke up to her mom asking for the phone. Terrence had called his mother and left. Their neighbor, who had heard the shots, called 9-1-1.

"I lost 80 percent of my face," Thomas said. Her right eye, nose, part of her jaw and top lip were gone. "The bullet lodged in my top shoulder… I should've died with the catastrophic injuries."

When the police arrived they thought she was dead. But, she had enough strength to grab an officer's ankle. She was sent to Hillcrest, a hospital in Waco, and was later airlifted to Scott & White, a hospital in Temple, Texas.

Terrence received two consecutive 60-year sentences consecutively. Even if he makes parole in about 30 years, he's got to serve the other sentence. Essentially, it's a life sentence. He is incarcerated in Huntsville, Texas.

"I do remember waking up, not being able to see," Thomas said. Her uncle and father were in the room with her.

She couldn't speak, but motioned for a piece of paper to ask about her mom. Her uncle didn't have the strength to tell her. Her dad did.

Thomas later learned her ex-boyfriend was hallucinating on angel dust.

She was in rehab for six months, relearning how to walk and had to regain vision in her left eye. She was unable to consume solid foods for about two years, and had seven major reconstructive surgeries, 13 altogether. Today she has a prosthetic eye and nose prosthesis, and soon she'll have teeth implants.

"I think that I inspire people by visual aid of outcome to what domestic violence can do," Thomas said.

She hopes her story will raise awareness for domestic violence and abuse as well as to raise funds for her non-profit foundation, Voices 4 All: The Carolyn Thomas Foundation.

The foundation is working to construct a women's shelter addressing the issue of women staying with their abuser. It will help the victims work through their excuses, such as staying with their abuser because of pets by providing a kennel at the shelter.

***

Lexy Dove, 45, of Fredericksburg will also be speaking at the conference. He'll be reading a poem he wrote about his experiences as a drug user and criminal.

"I'm just a young man who had a lifestyle of addiction and criminality," Dove, who works as a customer service representative at BJ's Wholesale Club, said. "I'm just a brother who's trying to give back, help some of the youngsters, at least give them a heads-up."

His goal now is to deter young people from making the same mistakes he did growing up.

Dove spent his youth hanging out in Arlington playgrounds, watching older kids with drugs.

"One day I picked up a roach," Dove said. "From there it springboarded."

By the time he was 11 or 12 he'd started with marijuana and went on to other, harder drugs: speed, crack-cocaine, angel dust and heroin, to name a few (to say nothing, of course, of alcohol). To pay for his habits, he turned to a life of crime, breaking into cars and homes to get money or jewelry. He lived this way for 20 to 30 years, in and out of prison. He estimates he has been behind bars for about 15 to 20 years total.

But, finally, he had enough. Enough of the drugs, enough of the prison, enough of having double-barreled shotguns jabbed into his back, enough of seeing how people behave when they are on drugs.

"A couple years ago I just got tired of doing nothing and having nothing," Dove said. "Either I'm going to die in the penitentiary or I'm going to get killed… I've cried many nights because I was stuck, I was trapped… I just started rebuilding my life."
He said his mother was the main person to help him get his life back on track.

He put together a short play, illustrating the behavior of individuals on drugs. He hopes to take it to schools, to demonstrate to students how stupid people behave. At the conference next Saturday he'll be speaking and reading a poem.

Dove said he isn't worried about a relapse either.

"I'm just done," Dove said.

Staff writer Josh Eiserike can be reached at 703-878-8072.

WANT TO GO?

What's up: Carolyn Thomas speaks out against domestic violence at Women Meeting Challenges-Making Change conference

When: May 17, from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m.

Where: Gar-Field Senior High School, 14000 Smoketown Road, Woodbridge

Info: 2008womensawarenessconference.org

Tickets: $15, purchase online at eventbrite.com/event/97910854 or call 571-288-1188